He is purple
Has a crossbones on chest
He sounds like me in the morning ("coffeeeee"...)
OMG WTF IS THAT COFFEE COMING OUT OF HIM
(Yes, I know it's sludge :p eww. But it may as well be Starbucks in that case).
Seriously, every game I whine until I get my KOFFING on. Then it's time to furiously level him up - his name is always "Bomby" :P -- until he reaches MAXIMUM KOFFITUDE. And then? Then he gets shoved out in every single match I'm in by yelling 'TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM, BOMBY!"
/inevitable explosion that almost knocks him out every time
YESSS.
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